It’s time to name and shame the
A-list set here on the Luxe Models blog this week. Here are the five worst
celebrity baby names in the history of Hollywood.
The one thing Luxe Models really hates about celebrities
Here at Luxe Models we love
celebrities. They’re fascinating creatures. The activities, style choices and
wardrobe blunders of the A-list set keep us endlessly amused every time we open
the latest edition of our favourite glossy.
Yet there’s one unfortunate
character trait of the average celebrity that fails to amuse us every time it
rears the ugly head. The A-list penchant for giving their progeny ridiculous
names. Seriously, how are these kids going to survive in the playground with
names like ‘Apple?’
Naming and shaming five A-list parents
In other words this week we’re
taking a stand for every child forced to endure a stupendous name by their
famous parents. The five worst celebrity baby names in the history of Hollywood
are…
1) North West: Only Kanye West could come
up with a name that makes him look more arrogant than he did after THAT TaylorSwift incident at the VMAs. He was blatantly trying to be clever when he
decided to name his daughter after a point on the compass but it totally
back-fired.
2) Destiny Cyrus: Stop the presses.
Miley’s real name is Destiny! Seriously, dad Billy Ray should be flogged for
this. No wonder she made such a show of herself at the 2013 VMAS with a name
like Destiny!
3) Apple Martin: God Gwyneth Paltrow’s
annoying. Only the queen of GOOP would think it’s a good idea to name her kid
after a fruit. She probably got the idea from whatever crazy fad diet she was
following at the time.
4) Kal-El Cage: Apparently Nicholas Cage
is a massive geek. How have we come to this conclusion? He named his son after
Superman. It doesn’t get any more Big
Bang Theory than that.
5) Zuma Nesta Rock: There are no words.
Apparently Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale named their kid after “Zuma” beach
in Malibu, which is kind of cool. Yet maybe they should have picked another
beach – they’ve made their child sound like an odd mix between a fitness
technique and a coffee brand.
Five of many horrific baby names
Do you agree? These are five
pretty bad Hollywood baby names but let’s face it, they’re just five of many. If
anything this post has reminded us that apparently the minute you reach the
stars you forget how things are for the rest of us back down here on earth.
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